Omegle.

You: Underneath these stairs, I hear the snares and feel the glares of my cousin, my uncle & my aunt.


Stranger: Proceed.

You: I can't believe how cruel they are, and it stings my lightning scar to know they never, ever give me what I want.

Stranger: Goddamn POTTER

Stranger: ILL YOU KILL IM VOLDEMORT

Stranger: ZAP ZAP BITCH

You: BITCH PLEASE.

You: I'M THE MOTHER FUCKING BOY WHO LiVED.

Stranger: IM THE DARKEST WIZARD AROUND THIS HOOD BITCH

Stranger: ILL FUCK YOU WITH MY WOODEN STICK HOE

Stranger: BTW WHEN I ZAPPED THAT SCAR ON YOU I JIZZED ON THAT SHIT

Stranger: LAWL

You: I'MMA AVADA KEDAVRA YOU INTO THE NEXT GHETTO ASS UNIVERSE.

You: BITCH. NOW I'MMA HAVE TO LATHER RINSE REPEAT.

Stranger: I CAME ON YOUR TODDLER FACE AND TELEPORTED OUT THAT BITCH LIKE A BOSS

Stranger: NOW IM GETTIN HEAD FROM ALL THE DARK WIZARD BITCHES

You: BITCH YOU AIN'T GON' GETTA WAY WITH KILLIN' MY SPERM DONERS.

You: LIKE WHO? THAT BITCH BELLATRIX LESTRANGE?

Stranger: Bro, hermoine doesnt even want your ass, ive hit that shit like 15 times

You: SHE HAS LIKE 25 STDs.

Stranger: bellatrix? fuck that hoe ive bent that ass over so many times.

You: Bitch please, Hermione ain't got nothin' on Cho Chang.

Stranger: Cho changs a little bitch, i railed her too in the attic of hogwarts motherfuckerrrrr

You: And that bitch Ginny Weasley? She prolly got AIDs, I ain't even tappin' that./

You: You couldn't even get into Hogwarts with a giant trampoline.

Stranger: You know before i killed your dad i made him lick my butthole right?

Stranger: Felt good man.

You: I'm sure, bro.

Stranger: Anyways im outtie five nigga gotta kill some more of your friends lewlz

I'm waiting for a hero.

I'm waiting.
I'm waiting for honesty, bluntness. I'm waiting for someone, anyone to say what they want to say when they want to say it and not sugar coat it. I'm waiting for someone to be real.
Whoever you are, I'm waiting for you. I'm counting on you. Your honesty could save me, you know. I don't know how many more lies and mixed signals I can take before I explode.

Amazing.

So, yesterday I was talking to a friend about how I found a book I was reading (Will Grayson, Will Grayson by John Green and David Levithan) completely depressing. Seeing as how she had read it herself, I figured she would understand. But she didn't agree in the least bit. She said there was something wrong inside of me, it was not the book. I knew she was right imediently. But, I did not know what it was. So I talked to a different friend about it, and I told her my dilema and everything. As soon as I was done talking, she knew exactly what was wrong with me. And she was right about it, too.
I found it completely amazing that she knew what was wrong without even having to think about it. And then I found it even more amazing that she sat there and listened to me talk about it (that was the best part. I've always been the listener, not the speaker. But it feels good to be the speaker every so often), and she gave me advice, and she understood where I was coming from.
Now, it is 4:23 in the morning, and I woke up with a thought:
Not everyone has a friend like this.
I hope whoever is reading this does, though. (Keep in mind that you don't have to be their listener for them to be yours.) If you don't, then be patient. You'll find one some day. You won't realize it at first, but one day it'll just hit you. And I'm going to have you make me this promise; here and now: never let them go without a fight. Pinky swear?

Photography.

I've decided what I want to do when I get older.
I want to be a photographer.
There's just something about taking and editing pictures that just appeals to me.
I love the creativity of it, I love the end products, I love seeing the simple perfections in all of the imperfect things in this world.
I love it.
Call me lame if you must, but this is honestly and truely what I want to do.
And I really don't give a flying fadoodle of what you think of it.
These are my dreams, and I'll lay the out as I please, thank you.

This is one of the pictures I've taken and edited.
It's my favorite.
So far.

Empty.

As you may or may not have known, my dog that I've had since 2nd grade (Maggie) recently passed away.
Yes, it's been hard, but how long do you expect me to greive?
I have been upset, I truely have. I've burst into tears by just looking at her collar (on a side note, the coffee table was not the smartest place to put it). It's not the easiest thing in the world when having her around is all you've come to know.
My friends have been scolding me for laughing.
I can't always be upset. That just makes it harder.
I have to take my mind off of it.
Because, you see, I get over things by not thinking about them.
But, her dying is not what's been getting to me. She was pretty sick, and I don't want to make something I love suffer for my own selfish benefit. I'm glad she died, because I didn't want her to be in pain.
The thing that's REALLY been getting to me is the emptiness of the house.
The quietness.
You try being home alone all day everyday and having your dog die.
It's not easy.
I still call her name when I go to let Lily out.
I still look behind the chair in the living room where she used to lay.
I still go to fill up her bowl when I feed Lily.
I still haven't gotten used to the fact that she's not here.
And that's the hardest part of all this.
Not her death.

Do you really know your friends?

So, pretty much all summer, I've been hidden indoors, away from anything and everything. I don't know why this is, because I just so happen to love being outside. I love laying in the grass and making shapes out of the clouds. I love going into my backyard and playing baseball with my four-year-old neighbor over the fence. I love taking my dogs on those walks with Tom and Beata around the little lake by my house, and letting the dogs run freely.
Shocking, right?
People might surprise you.
You might not know someone as much as you'd like to think you do.
Don't judge someone based on what you DO know about them.
Because there's so much more to a person.
So much about them that's just hiding in the shadows, planning it's attack...

My Mask.

Why is it that you enjoy
Pushing me down
The second I reach the top
Of that stupid mountain?
It has taken me months
Even years
To get here
And now I just have to
Start climbing
For a few more months
A few more years.
But, don't fret
I won't let you see my ugly tears
Spiralling down my face.
Just give me a moment
I'll put on my mask.
I'll put on a fake smile
Just for you, my dear.
Because I won't let you have
The satisfaction of seeing
Just how much you've hurt me.